User blog:JohnnyOTGS/JohnnyTalk Movies~Analyzing Home Alone's Traps
Hello everybody and welcome to another edition of JohnnyTalk Movies. Today I'm going to talk about and analyze the traps of the 2 Home Alone ''movies. As we all know about Home Alone, it's about Chicago's resident troublemaking kid: Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Kulkin) who was mistakenly left behind by his vacation bound family as they head for Paris for Christmas. Though most people consider Home Alone a Christmas movie. Though, the movie does take place around the holiday but has little to do about the holiday itself. Anyway, Kevin gets wind of 2 local house burglars Harry Lime (Joe Pesci) and Marvin "Marv" Merchants (Daniel Stern) making plans to rob Kevin's own house on Christmas Eve, Kevin then makes up his plans to wire his house with makeshift booby traps to defend his house from Harry and Marv. That is going to be our topic for today, is studying and analyzing the traps Kevin sets for Harry and Marv in the 2 Home Alone movies, and what kind of damage it would do to the 2 burglars. Disclaimer: I, JohnnyOTGS am not a doctor, so the damage that I say is estimates, not exact. Home Alone's Traps As said before, the most iconic thing about the Home Alone movies is the traps, but what kind of damage would they do in real life? Let's find out. Both~B.B. Gun The first thing that Harry and Marv get hit by is a B.B. Gun which belongs to Kevin's Brother: Buzz. Kevin pokes the BB Gun through the doggy door and manages to shoot Harry in the Testicles. Of course, taking a hit in the Testicles doesn't feel good. Marv then pokes his head through the doggy door where Kevin is waiting and shoots Marv in the head. BB Gun rounds won't wound you like regular gun ammunition, but it hurts nevertheless. But no actual damage would be done. Both~Icy Stairs One of the first traps Kevin sets, he throws water on the steps of his front porch and the stairs leading to the basement. This is assuming that the air outside is 32°F or below for water to freeze. Harry fell off the icy porch twice. The first one probably won't do any damage since he fell on a flat surface, but his second fall, his head landed on one of the steps and with the motion of his body going forward would injure his neck, perhaps even herniated a few discs. Marv would have more bad luck when he fell on the icy stairs leading to the basement. Unlike Harry who landed on a flat surface, Marv landed on the stairs and landed on his left side. He would've easily broken his pelvis and because of this, he wouldn't be able to get up by himself. '''Deaths: None' Marv~Iron As Marv entered the basement, he finds a hanging light bulb and turns it on, but he realizes too late it was one of Kevin's traps, it fell and hit Marv in the face, leaving an imprint. There's little chance that Marv would've suffered any burns on his face because some time has passed from when Kevin set the trap to Marv setting it off, more than likely the iron would've cooled off, plus the Iron only fell approximately 5 feet and would do moderate damage. Marv at the most would've suffered a broken nose and some bruising on his face. Deaths: None Harry~Searing-Hot Doorknob Using some kind of grilling tool, Kevin put the "grilling tool" onto the knob of the Front Door, so the metal of the knob would be "too hot to handle" so to say. As we see before Harry touches the doorknob, it's glowing red. For this to happen, the grilling tool would have to be at a temperature of at least 750°F. Nevertheless, when Harry touches it, it burns his hand to the point that it sizzles (literally). Harry than frantically tries to cool it off, and he eventually does by putting his burnt hand into the snow. But as we see him pull his hand out of the snow, the burn on his hand looks closer to that of a sunburn. In reality, Harry's hand would've suffered 3rd-degree burns (especially if smoke was coming out of his hand), so his hand would be charred black, and he wouldn't be able to use it, perhaps even having to lose his hand. Deaths: None Marv~1-Foot Nail Marv tries to go up the stairs leading to the interior of the house, but Kevin layed down some Tar on the stairs where Marv would have to leave his shoes and socks in the sticky material, then as he got halfway, he steps his left foot on a nail which is around 1 foot long. It takes Marv around 5 seconds to realize this and he falls backward off the stairs. Marv didn't let the nail goes all the way through his foot but stepped on it far enough to cause pain, because of this the wound on his foot would be deep and he would be bleeding profusely, and given the tar on his foot and the floor he walked on when he exited the basement (forgotten about the icy stairs) the wound would be quickly infected and thus would be in much more pain. Of course, after a while, the wound could become gangrenous. Deaths: None Harry~Blowtorch For the back door, Kevin set up an old fashioned Blowtorch which used the nearby cabinet knobs and well the knob on the back door to set it off. Harry's head and his black hat get burned, and then Harry runs frantically and dunks his head into the snow. After putting his head back up, much like his right hand, the burn on his head looks like a sunburn. As if Harry needs any more burns on his body especially after burning his right hand on that knob to the front door. In reality (and like his right hand) Harry's Head would have a massive 3rd-degree burn, putting him in even more pain than he sustained on his right hand, his scalp would also be severely damaged. Apart from Harry's injuries, the door and the cabinet holding the blowtorch would also have burn marks on them. Deaths: None Harry~Heavy-Duty Glue & Feathers Another trap, Kevin sets as he takes a huge piece of plastic wrap and puts glue on it and then places a fan with a small pile of feathers in front of it. When Harry (already in the house) sets off this trap, he walks into the glued wrap which is behind the door leading to the dining room and then sets off the wire to turn on the fan and it blows the feathers right on him. The glue Kevin used was *not* Elmer glue (the glue that would be used in school) but a more heavy-duty kind of glue which is much stronger. So, when Harry pulled off the glued plastic wrap, he could pull off both of his eyebrows (or at least most of them) Yeah, it'll stink, but no real injuries there. Deaths: None Marv~Glass Christmas Tree Ornaments & Old Light Bulbs Kevin opened a window and placed old glass Christmas Tree Ornaments and some old Christmas Light Bulbs. When Marv comes back up from the Basement and sees an open window and heads to it, he then opens up the curtains and (with his feet still bare) steps on the ornaments and bulbs and screams in pain. Like with Harry and 3rd-degree burns. Marv at this point doesn't need any more wounds on his feet. But glass can easily slice through the skin on a human foot, so Marv would open up more wounds and cuts on (now) both of his feet which would bleed profusely, and because a bit of tar is still on his feet and walking on the floor, those cuts would be infected, because there are more of them and now both of his feet, there's a greater chance for gangrene. Deaths: None, but at this point, Marv would have to lose both of his feet because of Gangrene The Micro Machines (remember those) that both Harry and Marv step on and slipped and fell wouldn't do any real damage, though they may feel pinching pain because some of those toys have pointy places. Though with Marv's bare feet already badly cut and punctured at this point, it would be a pain that would even be making stepping on Legos seem like walking on a comfy cushion. Both~ Paint Cans For a good measure, Kevin has also found 2 paint cans and tied them to a string to throw them from the top of the stairs so they may hit Harry and Marv as they make their way up the stairs. Both get hit by the paint cans If you pay close attention to this (and looked at the previous picture before this one above) that the paint cans were used as they have dry paint on the outside, but there's still a good amount of paint inside these cans to do some serious damage, and if you do the math, Kevin also threw the cans down instead of just dropping them, giving the cans more kinetic energy. Paint cans can hit with enough force to not only break the noses of Harry and Marv, but it'll give them a concussion, perhaps even drive the cartilage in their noses and pierce into their brains, and it's lights out. Deaths: 2 Harry~Crowbar Kevin's last trap, which an elastic string designed to trip Harry and Marv, though Harry trips on the string, Marv jumps over it and manages to grab Kevin's left ankle. It wasn't until Kevin's brother Buzz's pet Tarantula came in and Kevin grabs the Tarantula and places it on Marv's face, who screams and clumsily lets Kevin go and frantically throws the Tarantula onto Harry's chest. Then, Marv picks up his crowbar and tries to kill the Tarantula with total disregard for Harry's safety, he whacks harry with his crowbar (though the Tarantula escapes). In reality, Harry would more than likely be slowly dying as the Crowbar struck his chest, and there's more than just shattered ribs, those "shattered ribs" could also puncture one or both of Harry's lungs and/or arteries and/or veins, and those blood vessels are major which lead to or draw from the heart. Deaths: 3 Both~House's Outer Wall Kevin has taken some rope and tied it to the "3rd floor" of the house and tied it to the trunk of the tree of his treehouse which (for Kevin) is a fast getaway. But when Harry and Marv try to use the rope, Kevin uses a pair of hedge clippers to cut the rope, before Harry and Marv try to get to safety, Kevin cuts the rope sending Harry and Marv right into the outer wall of the house. In reality, this could cause substantial injuries such as broken noses, broken cheekbones and maybe even a dislocated shoulder or 2. Deaths: 3 Both~Snow Shovel When both Harry and Marv manage to capture Kevin at the Murphy house, they say they were going to hurt him, oblivious to "Old Man Marley" (Roberts Blossom) coming in to try to save Kevin. He hits Harry and Marv with his trusty snow shovel. Now, this is a bit more difficult to analyze as this depends on how hard Marley hits Harry and Marv with his shovel. Marley hits Marv in the back of the head, which could give him a concussion. Harry gets hit on the left side of the face (hence why he has a black eye when taken away by the police) but he could permanently lose sight f his left eye as it would disconnect his retina, depending on how hard he was hit, Harry could also suffer a concussion too. Deaths: 3, though it's possible that Harry and Marv could die from getting hit from a snow shovel. Now let's move onto the next movie, shall we? Home Alone 2's traps Once again, the McCallister clan is vacation bound, this time they're going to Miami. But at the airport, Kevin gets separated from his family and ends up on a plane bound for New York City. But, once the hotel he's staying at (The Plaza) finds out he was using his father's credit card (which was reported stolen) Kevin finds himself lost in America's most iconic city. But Kevin will meet up with Harry and Marv again, who plan to rob the city's huge toy store (Duncan's Toy Chest) Kevin, knowing that Harry and Marv must be stopped, sets up traps for them once again. Kevin uses his uncle Rob's renovated townhouse as one giant trap for Harry and Marv, and now has some deadlier traps at his disposal. So, let's analyze them. Harry~Balancing Board While Harry and Marv were staling the money from the Toy Store (as well as the charity money for the city's children's' hospital) Kevin sets up a balancing board (with a piece of a wooden board with a bucket). He even uses a brick to break one of the display windows to set off the store's alarm, antagonizing both Harry and Marv, but once Harry steps on the board, he tells Marv to not step on it, but does anyway, sending Harry flying into the air and lands on a car. Now, I've seen other movies where people fell onto cars and died. But that's because those people fell from places higher than Harry did, and he wouldn't have done this much damage to the car he landed on. Nevertheless, he would've sprained his back and neck very badly. Deaths: None Marv~Bricks Kevin leads Harry and Marv to his Uncle's Townhouse. Harry makes a fake plea to not hurt him if he gives him his camera. But Kevin knows Harry isn't being sincere with his plea and decides to throw bricks instead. They hit Marv not once, not twice, not 3 times, but 4 times. In reality, Marv would've sustained a massive concussion and a substantial skull fracture from the first brick that hit him, and that's assuming that the first brick doesn't kill him. But because he was hit by 4 bricks, yeah he would be dead. Deaths: 1 Marv~Staple Gun One of the tools Kevin found in the tool chest was a powered staple gun which he attached to the front door. After Marv recovered from his "Brick Daze" he heads up the front door and pulls the knob after taking up the string's slack, he tries to open the door, only to be hit by a staple from the gun. Marv gets hit by 3 staples, one to the butt, one to the testicles, and one to the nose. Taken that the staples are more heavy-duty than regular paper staples, but still they won't do any serious damage. Especially compared to the 4 bricks Marv just took to the head. Deaths: 1 Marv~Huge Hole As Kevin was setting up his traps, he also removes the panels to give nothing to walk on when going through the front door. After removing the staples, Marv kicks the front door in and after arrogantly saying he has gone into the townhouse, he falls into the giant hole. Marv easily fell 2 stories (approximately 30 feet) so he would've easily suffered some serious injuries. Apart from a Broken nose and some facial fractures, Marv would've bruised his ribs (if he didn't break them, that is) and would also be unconscious for a while. Nevertheless, he would be in no fit state to get up on his own. Deaths: 1 Both~Body Wash Previously, Kevin bought some Body Wash (labeled "Monster Sap") at Duncan's Toy Chest. He uses this stuff to set up some traps. Not only does Kevin create a puddle of body wash in the basement, but he also used a paint roller and puts the body wash on some of the poles of an old fire escape ladder. Both Harry and Marv fall for these traps. When Harry tried to jump and grab the ladder with the body wash on it, he slips off. Harry fell a good 8 feet and landed on his back, so he would have a moderate back sprain from this fall. Marv, on the other hand, had it much worse as he tried (and failed) to not slip on the puddle of body wash in the basement and he slides right into a shelf of paint cans. Not like the paint cans in the first movie, these cans didn't have much height to fall, but still, it'll add to his supposedly already bruised ribs and broken nose, amplifying his pain. Deaths: 1 Harry~Bag of Tools Kevin has set a bag of tools above the back door to the townhouse, triggered by a string on the back door. When Harry kicks the door in, the bag opens and is pelted by heavy wrenches. Now, these are very heavy wrenches that came down on Harry. So clearly, he would've been dead from these wrenches. Deaths: 2 Marv~Electrified Faucet Finding some kind of electrical machine, Kevin then uses the clamps to hook them on the faucet in the basement. When Marv gets up from the shelf (covered in paint) he wants to wash off the paint but was then electrocuted (with his skeleton briefly shown). As Marv was being electrocuted, Kevin was nearby to increase the power. In reality, this would most definitely kill Marv has he was hit with enough electricity to stop his heart. On top of that, both of his forearms would be charred black from the electricity. Deaths: 3 Harry~Welder & Flammable Liquid Another tool Kevin found in the tool chest was a modern welder (with modern functions) as well as a flammable liquid that looks like water. He sets the welder above the bathroom door and has it turn on when the nearby light is turned on and put the flammable liquid in the empty toilet to make it look like the toilet is full of water. When Harry turns on the light and thus the welder, it sends a fireball which sets Harry's head alight. He doesn't notice it until he looks in a mirror. He frantically tries to put out the flames on his head, but finding out that the faucets don't work, he tries the toilet which he believes is full of water, but instead is full of the aforementioned flammable liquid, this causes an explosion and leaves Harry black. Dea Boy, is Harry unlucky when it comes to burns? In reality, Harry's body would've gone up in flames long before he dunks his head into the toilet since it's the fumes of flammable liquids is what causes them to ignite (like gasoline). Harry's body would burn for a few seconds, but in the end, he would be dead. Not just from the 3rd-degree burns all over his body, but also his lungs sustaining major smoke damage. Deaths: 4 This movie has exceeded the first movie's death toll. Marv~100 Lb. Bag of Plaster Mix After getting up from electrocution, Marv than sees a rope dangling, after tugging on it a few times (to make sure it's tied to something good) he tries to climb up, but then the Ropefalls and with it a 100 Lb. bag of plaster mix comes down and hits Marv in the head, covering him in plaster. In reality, Marv would be dead. Because (obviously) a 100 Lb. bag of plaster mix is heavier than a pressing iron, and because he was already looking up when the bag hit him, this would've easily snapped his neck, perhaps disconnecting the bottom of his spine and causing it to stick out of his front. Deaths: 5 Harry~Broken Ladder As he was setting the traps, Kevin took a ladder and used a saw to make it unstable. He goes up this ladder as he knows it would take his weight, but not Harry or Marv's. As Harry goes up the ladder, the ladder breaks and he falls. This is probably the most accurate trap for the movie, yeah some pain after the fall, but no serious injuries. Deaths: 5 Both~Cast Iron DrainPipe Kevin set traps for thew stairs as well. After suggesting to Harry and Marv to take the stairs, they take them. After Kevin threw 2 paint cans down (probably as a smokescreen) and Harry and Marv go up the stairs, he throws down a cast iron drainpipe which causes Harry and Marv to fall into the hole Marv fell into earlier. It's "painfully" obvious (pun intended) that both Harry and Marv would be dead as soon as they got hit with the iron pipe as this would smash their skulls and cause a deadly brain tremor. Deaths: 7 Then there's the tool chest scene where it pushed Harry and Marv to the wall, but I'll talk about it later. Both~Burning Rope & Sticky tuff Kevin found some Kerosene and put it in a bucket and then placed a rope in the flammable substance to soak it. One Harry and Marv found out, it was too late, and Kevin lit it on fire, and they fell 3 stories. Kevin even placed several cans of sticky stuff (possibly industrial strength glue) on one side of the scaffolding and once Harry and Marv fell, it lifted the cans and they would be doused in the sticky stuff. Harry and Marv fell from around 2 stories. Harry landed on his back and would definitely break his back falling that far and possibly paralyze him too. Marv who landed on Harry would've faired better since he landed on Harry who would provide him some cushion for his fall. But in the end, both would be dead, Marv would've died with the cans of sticky stuff falling on him. Deaths: 9 Of course, after Kevin slips on ice and was captured by Harry and Marv who took him to the park to try to kill him, the Irish Pidgeon Lady than threw birdseed on the doused burglars and they were surrounded by Pidgeons. Of course, no major injuries here. Home Alone 2 in some ways also ignores Newton's laws of motion at times. Like Kevin lifting the Iron pipe, there's no way a kid like Kevin could've lifted something like that all by himself. The Tool Chest tied to the door and when Harry pulled the knob, it made the tool chest come down the stairs, and if you saw the movie it sent Harry right to the wall. In reality, this wouldn't happen, though it would take the door off the hinges, but would also fall to the floor. The scaffolding that had the cans of sticky stuff also went straight up once both Harry and Marv went through the scaffolding, in reality, the cans would've gone forward and away from Harry and Marv. In both movies, Marv and Harry (together) died 12 times. These traps would also have given them a pretty hefty medical bill which would make them an *extreme* liability to most health insurance plans. Well, that's it for this edition of ''JohnnyTalk Movies. ''Don't forget to check out my Games and Movies wikis too. Until next time, this is JohnnyOTGS. Category:Blog posts